This week has been rough.
I’ve mentioned before about my depression struggles Ive had over the years – with the last several having the struggle occur mostly between February – April with the eye of the storm being around St Patrick’s day.
This year is strange though. Previously it would be a depression and anxiety that I would fight against while replaying events in my head that related to this time frame. But since I wrote the books and wrote about events a bit here as well over the past year-plus I worked through a lot of my feelings related to them… This year I have had some depression start without triggering memories or thoughts.
It’s as if my brain just realizes that this is the time I “should” be depressed. It’s been coming on for the past few weeks, slowly… but this week felt especially hard as I am on the ledge – peering out over my depression and trying not to fall in.
Today I stayed home sick and after I took my kids to school, I came home and went back to sleep until 1:30 in the afternoon. Sleep is the only time I get a real reprieve from this struggle. Sleep is Glorious and… I just want to go back to bed.