I’ve said it before – I hate to cry over men. Really it’s more of a hate to let them see that I’m crying over them. Eventually, the closer I get and the longer I know them the more likely they are statistically to witness an outpouring of emotion I am unable to control before I get away. Nevertheless, it’s been awhile… But I cried over a boy this morning.
It wasn’t a romantic related issue at least… I am for the most part past those days of my youth where I may or may not have sobbed over a mean boy or two.
I can’t go into too many details – he wouldn’t appreciate the world knowing, he’s asked me in the past to not put other related details out here in blogland a time or two over the past few years.
However; today this man suggested that he is not good enough to be my friend. He is not a friend I deserve… He told me to give up on him. It reminded me of the time my husband told me he had always thought that I was too good for him and that one day I would leave him for a better man (he told me this back in 2008 after the thing with David blew up.)
My heart just about broke.
I’m not going to give up on him… I haven’t yet over the many years I’ve known him. I’ve made it clear to him that I won’t give up on him and that I still love him – he means too much to me. He seemed to appreciate that.
I had a good cry after it was all done. He would have had no idea, naturally, what I was doing in that moment.
I know I could probably save myself a lot of hurt having let our friendship end years and years ago… but he said once that we need to stick together, me and him… and you know, I intend to keep that promise.