depression, support, Uncategorized

I’ll be praying for you

Ugh, I feel like an ass. I’ve railed before against using common platitudes with people who are struggling – with depression or other personal problems.

Yet, today… Faced with a friend who was struggling and crying… I didn’t know what else to say, so I said “I’ll be praying for you.”

I became the very person I dislike in these cases. I apologized shortly after for not really knowing the words to say or the ability to affect their situation in any real way.  I suppose at least I recognize what I said in the moment wasn’t ideal.

It’s still gonna weigh on my mind for awhile though… sigh.

Also, recently I found out that “Leroy” self harmed pretty badly earlier this year in which he needed medical attention and has left scars. Oh, the desire to squeeze the ever loving tar out of him. Unfortunately, even if I had stayed in Australia, he moved earlier this year as well so no matter my wish to support him as I used to – it just isn’t anywhere near possible. Luckily with moving and with his current relationship, he is doing a lot better over all… so hopefully that helps his mental health somewhat. Better than the damage some of his circumstances were doing to him before at least.

In other news I’d like to note that the reason I’m absent of late is that I have a publishing contract for an unfinished manuscript – that I must finish by Dec 15… so all my writing time must be focused on that for the time being. I’ll be back more regularly as soon as I’m able 🙂

11 thoughts on “I’ll be praying for you”

  1. I can’t find anything wrong with what you said. If it bothered you than you are missing the point of your own words. They are supposed to bring comfort to someone else. If they can do that it shouldn’t matter how “ugh” you feel about it since it isn’t about you. I, personally, don’t pray enough to be an expert on it. But I have seen those very words you said bring great comfort to many people. Quite often many people will actually ask for prayers when they are going through a hard time. It’s a good thing what you said. Your friend is lucky to have you. Oh, and good luck with your unfinished manuscript. Hope you beat that deadline. I’ll be rooting for you. – Robert

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, I just know sometimes it sounds trite and unhelpful if they don’t otherwise ask for prayers. This person is a friend from church, so thats why I figured to say it in the moment… so maybe it did bring some comfort… I hope this person recognized my good wishes for them. I’d hate to compound a problem by coming off as insincere.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah, I get it. As has been said in the news a lot recently “It’s the impact not the intent that matters”. I hope your friend found comfort in your words. Or, more likely, in you just being there for them. Good luck with your writing! – Robert

        Liked by 1 person

      1. LOl I have read some of your stuff before and I just took a good look at your username. I had always read it as “I am not the villain”. Lol. Just now took a good look at it. LOl. I need to pay better attention.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Sometimes I fall into the same way of thinking – that maybe those words aren’t the best for the situation, but really they are. And then sometimes I’m on the other side of it, where I will detail a problem for a friend, looking for their advice or some sort of comfort or guidance and they reply with “if it’s God’s plan…” or the “I’ll pray for you” and then I get upset because I was expecting more of a reply? I guess it all depends on the person and the situation at hand.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You know how I feel about using and hearing clichés in times of crisis so I can obviously empathise. Sometimes, however, original or lesser used terms simply don’t or won’t come to mind and it’s better than saying nothing at all. I definitely wouldn’t be too hard on myself in your shoes.

    Liked by 1 person

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