I slept like shit last night you guys, and let me tell you why. Well, first of all I’m sick – so that didn’t help things, but… since I’m sick and feared being contagious to hubby, I slept on the couch. I had a new bottle of Paxil in the living room so I took that as I should, but didn’t bother with my prazosin since it was in the bedroom and hubs was already asleep.
I figured, meh… the Paxil is the main important one, right?
For those of you that aren’t up-to-date with this blog – prazosin is typically a medication for high blood pressure, but I take it for PTSD dreams. I don’t otherwise have a circulatory issue I’m concerned about if I miss a dose. There’s been a couple of times in the past year plus since I started it that I’ve fallen asleep without remembering my meds – and I no longer have actual PTSD dreams when I miss a dose. My dreams will be very vivid and WIERD, but hadn’t been directly related to PTSD.
So, this time I had made the conscious decision to not bother sneaking into the bedroom since I still had access to my Paxil.
YOU GUYS. That fucking dream though….
It was not only weird, but scary as well… No, PTSD events were still not included, but man… I can’t remember all the events in the dream. There was a clear storyline – I do recall that, a lot of sneaking and blending into crowds with a friend etc to hide from some bad guy…. And at some point a creepy old person following me around or something…
What really freaked me out though, was more than once in my dream I’d be sleeping and I would semi-wake as I felt a seizure coming on – there’d be a buzzing feeling all over me – and I’d be yelling out for my husband only to realize I wasn’t capable of yelling – though it felt like I was. Then I would – for real – realize I was waking up in the middle of it all – the trying to move my mouth wasn’t working still even though I was becoming aware of my real surroundings. Once I would wake up fully, I’d realize my extremities were numb on one side of my body, the legit buzzing feeling (just from having slept on them in a weird couch position.)
I woke up at least two or three times like this, and each time I would try to steer my brain to a different dream at least – because regardless it wasn’t a pleasant dream over all. Steering my mind as I fall asleep usually works, but it didn’t last night. The seizure dream and waking part was by far the freakiest though.
I can’t be positive it was only the missing medication – I wonder too if my illness contributed to the situation. But needless to say, I’ll be taking my prazosin tonight for sure.