Best Friends, Dan, Maja, memories, nostalgia, relationships, Uncategorized

F*ck me, I’d be lying

The day was chilly, but hardly cold. At least not in the sense that we had to wear actual jackets - but it's all relative, I guess. Swedish autumn warranted our turtle neck sweaters; mine being the rusty orange one I had bought in Copenhagen, and Maja's was striped with blues and browns. As always,… Continue reading F*ck me, I’d be lying

Andre, Best Friends, Dan, Dane, David, Husband, Justin, memoir, memories, nostalgia, relationships, Sven, teenage years, Uncategorized, Viktor, Wyatt

Taylor Swift Gets Me : Reprise

While we’re on the topic of Taylor Swift, I went back and perused my posts from February 2015 – when I started this blog – and came across one of the first posts I had written that was also a I-have-a-girl-crush-on-Taylor kind of post. What I had done is compiled and mashed up several of… Continue reading Taylor Swift Gets Me : Reprise

Adventures in Dating, Dan, relationships, Uncategorized

A Kick in The Gut

I was scrolling through tumblr for the first time in months when I came across this on the Unsent Project page I follow: I don't think I've mentioned the unsent project before on here - it is where people send in text messages they wish the could send to old lovers, primarily, and the artist… Continue reading A Kick in The Gut

Dan, relationships, Uncategorized

This Should Have Ended

A friend once told me that my mind must always be on... She'd read my blog once in awhile and it just amazed her at how much I have to say and how many blog posts I could churn out. I don't feel like they are all that many - of course I go through… Continue reading This Should Have Ended

Best of, Dan, memories, relationships, teenage years, Uncategorized

Rory and Jess / Emma and Dan

So there I was, re-watching Gilmore Girls for the umpteenth time. I’ve slowly made my way up through Season 3 over the past few weeks and last night culminated in Rory Graduating from Chilton. Rory Gilmore graduated in 2003 – the year after I graduated Gymnasium. So essentially, Rory would be close to my age.… Continue reading Rory and Jess / Emma and Dan

Adventures in Dating, Dan, Jimmy, relationships, Uncategorized

Damn, Son…

Jimmy posted a picture of himself and his daughter on FB - they were dressed up for some formal occasion and my first thought was "Well, Jimmy cleans up nice..." I commented that he had a gorgeous date, because he did. And I wondered to myself if I missed out on something not acting on… Continue reading Damn, Son…

Adventures in Dating, Dan, relationships, Uncategorized

It’s a Shame

It's a shame. It's a shame that he never appeared to care as much as I did. It's a shame that even with a decade and a half of maturing under our belts, we still can't get passed old behaviors. So I got older, so I took the chance and laid myself bare to him… Continue reading It’s a Shame

Best Friends, Dan, memoir, memories, relationships, Uncategorized, Wyatt

Airing my dirty laundry

Sometimes I forget that people might get taken aback when I am frank about my personal life. I've never worried much about "airing the family's dirty laundry" as my parents called it. I would get scolded once in awhile for saying things that were supposedly our family figurative undergarments; but even now it was never… Continue reading Airing my dirty laundry

Adventures in Dating, Dan, memoir, memories, Timmy, Uncategorized, Wyatt

Oh, for Prompt’s sake

Yesterday I stumbled upon the idea of Journal Prompts. I've seen people blog to writing prompts, and while I get the reasoning behind it, or the need some people might feel to use them - I never felt they were worth my time. I write when I want to write and I only write what… Continue reading Oh, for Prompt’s sake

Dan, memories, relationships, support, teenage years, Uncategorized, youth

“Teenage Drama”

I had an interesting conversation with another adult involved with Cadets recently. In which she mentioned that she had never been exposed to such "Teenage Drama" before moving here and working with the youth we work with now. I was like "You mean... besides high school, right?" No, no she didn't... she meant ever. I… Continue reading “Teenage Drama”

Best of, Dan, memories, nostalgia, relationships, Uncategorized

Deep-Seated Wishes

I can't be the only one. I'm sure I'm not. I'm sure that there are others like me that wish we could live our life again. There's so many things I want to change, so many decisions I want to reverse.  I know what you're thinking - you think I am talking about changing things… Continue reading Deep-Seated Wishes

Adventures in Dating, Best Friends, Dan, Dane, David, Husband, Maja, relationships, svea, Uncategorized

Movie of our life

So, over the weekend I found out some information about my life, my family, etc that was a bit of a shock if I'm honest. Of course my first instinct was "OH MY GOD - I HAVE TO WRITE THIS ON MY BLOG." But of course, I knew I'd have to restrain myself from that.… Continue reading Movie of our life

Best of, Dan, memoir, relationships

The world didn’t burn

Have you ever had the urge to watch the world burn, as they say? To just throw caution to the wind and let the chips fall where they may? I had that urge yesterday. It may not seem like a big deal to you, but for me telling Dan anything about my feelings is like… Continue reading The world didn’t burn

Andre, Dan, Jimmy, Justin, memoir, relationships, Sven, Viktor

Hopefully he won’t read it…

I typed up a message, copy and pasting for the most part - since I had sent basically the same message to a handful of other men. The messages and emails were notifications that I wrote a particular book and that I had written about them in it. I told them if they wanted to read… Continue reading Hopefully he won’t read it…

Dan, memories, relationships

“Bye, Dan.”

I hadn’t spoken to Dan in almost a year. Towards the end of his senior year, we had a huge fight. Huge for us anyway. Usually when we fought it would end in saying something snarky, mild anger might be involved – I might just look at him and walk away. Likely I’d be annoyed… Continue reading “Bye, Dan.”

Dan, relationships

Dan – The Starting Point

Wow, so I got some really good feedback about “In the Courtyard,” and got a request to write more about Dan. So, I think I will – I find that writing about him comes along easily and it ends up being some of my best work, in my opinion. Maybe I should thank him for… Continue reading Dan – The Starting Point

Best of, Dan, memories, relationships, teenage years

In the Courtyard

I walked out into the courtyard; it was a perfectly sunny Swedish springtime day. I took a glance around, conscious of the fact that I was in Gymnasium – conscious that we were all teenagers and therefore I needed to exude cool. Especially if he happened to be outside. My glance around was an effort… Continue reading In the Courtyard

Best of, Dan, relationships

Birthday Greetings

I've always remembered Dan's birthday as being in May - usually I recall the date as well, though some years it slips my mind. It's funny how some birthday dates just stick in your mind - not because of any specific memory to do with the date... For instance I still remember my Jr High… Continue reading Birthday Greetings

Dan, memoir, relationships

Excerpt: Dan… or “No apologies. He’ll never see you cry.”

**Hi all, working on a few ideas that aren't pulling together quite right just yet... so I decided to post another excerpt from my book. This is part of the chapter about Dan. My tumultuous boy 🙂 On one hand, I don't want to give away all of my good parts in the book... but… Continue reading Excerpt: Dan… or “No apologies. He’ll never see you cry.”

Dan, memories, relationships

Happy Memory #2 – Dan and the Shore of Lidingö

It was late afternoon one Spring Saturday as I sat down in front of the Pressbyrån at Ropsten train station to wait for Dan.  We had arranged to meet here, but I was early so I plugged my headphones into my ears as I settled in to wait. After a few minutes I saw a… Continue reading Happy Memory #2 – Dan and the Shore of Lidingö