"I hate them because they are black," she said. My mouth dropped open, I was so shocked at the sheer boldness of her statement. I don't think I had ever heard someone be so clear cut in expressing their racism. I sputtered, trying to put my thoughts together so that I could form the sounds… Continue reading Ashamed I Did Not Have the Words at the Ready
You guys. I did it. Not only did I pass my RN-NCLEX a couple weeks ago, but I have - as of today - officially become a Registered Nurse. I know I have written about how I wanted to be an RN for a long time on this blog before - years ago at this… Continue reading “It’s Been a Long Road” …or “Never Give Up on Your Dreams”
A few days ago I was listening to a podcast, as I am wont to do almost any moment during my free time these days, and the guest struck a particular cord with me this time. She was a 90s girl at heart, she told Dax Shepard on his podcast "Armchair Expert" (August 12, 2019… Continue reading 90s Girl at Heart
I slept like shit last night you guys, and let me tell you why. Well, first of all I'm sick - so that didn't help things, but... since I'm sick and feared being contagious to hubby, I slept on the couch. I had a new bottle of Paxil in the living room so I took… Continue reading Weird Couch Fever Dream
I had a post pop up yesterday in my Facebook memories from years ago... A post that one of Dane's exes had written to me, after she had moved on and married someone else that is. It was a generic catch-up conversation, in which she noted she hadn't really spoken to Dane in awhile -… Continue reading Unfortunately Irritating
How do I even start today? I wanted to update you all on the awesome externship experience I've been having, but intertwined with that has been a trip to Cleveland to spread my grandfather's ashes. This, of course, meant I had to see my family. For the most part this wasn't an issue. Got to… Continue reading Monumental Clusterfuck
Dane unfriended me on Facebook. I told you that. He inferred I was disposable and it seemed he'd rather keep David in the FB friendship circle. Ok, fine then. I accepted that, though it hurt initially. The thing is, even after pushing me away so hard; trying his damnedest to put distance between us and… Continue reading Smoldering Bridge
Sorry for the delay in updating, my psych appointment was postponed a few weeks. I had my follow up just yesterday afternoon. I discussed with my doctor the fact that I've seen the article about David... with his accolades saying he recently was promoted to Major, he's getting his Masters in a few months, and… Continue reading The Night Is Dark and Full of Terrors
I have a follow up with my psychiatrist in a few days. She wants to check on how my meds are doing now that I am entering the annual timeframe that the worst of my PTSD usually takes effect. So what am I going to tell her? I keep thinking about it... do I still… Continue reading At What Level is it Normal?
Oh gosh, you guys, I hadn't realized it had been quite so long since I have written on here... Apologies for any of you that may have worried about me or what have you. Well, let's be honest, I'm sure most didn't notice - I take random long breaks fairly regularly - but imma gonna… Continue reading Take your Xanax, mothers, Emma is fine
I've discovered something definitive about my friendship with Dane this week. Well, ex-friendship at this point. I have become disposable to him. I'm not sure when exactly it happened, sometime over the last two years since I moved back to the USA. Up until that point... the last time I had talked to him while… Continue reading Being Disposable
I've been so busy lately... I was hoping to write a proper blog post last weekend, while I was off of work - but I was away in Philadelphia for my sister's wedding, and my hopes for some downtime for writing did not come to fruition. I feel like I have so much to say,… Continue reading Heeeey… I’m Still Alive!
Over the weekend of July 13-15, I FINALLY got to go back to my happy place - Sandhamn. Really the island itself is called Sandö, Sandhamn is the main harbor area on one side... But I digress. This time, instead of just me an Svea, we had a full house! Hubs and I met an… Continue reading Revisiting Sandhamn
I've been working on my Sweden Trip posts... But also I got my manuscript back from my editor on Thursday before working Friday through Sunday... so It'll be a little bit before I get those promised posts out. However, I have another long-awaited post to give you now... So... Enjoy 🙂 **************** Yesterday, I went… Continue reading Double Depression, Anxiety, and… Emma’s Mental Health Update
Hey y'all, I'm back from the most awesome vacay (in Scandinavia) I ever had! Woo! I will be back with you presently... well, sometime within this week to picture dump, err, post some blog posts all about my trip. I'm not sure yet if I want to go all out travel blog for a bit… Continue reading I’m Baaaaaaaaack! 😀
I finally had my psych appointment yesterday. I was so tense and nervous all day, even after the appointment was over. Tension headache plagued me all day, I felt winded, and my tummy was upset most of the afternoon as well - primarily just before and through the appointment itself. I had about an hour… Continue reading Psych Appointment and Update
Gosh you guys, I've been in a funk as you know and totally went off the diet efforts for the past several weeks. Not always completely off... but... there were days I definitely craved donuts and/or cookie dough and gave in. It doesn't help that I'm an emotional eater, then in snowballs so even when… Continue reading Back on Track
It's been awhile since I've written about anything related to relationships and/or the memories thereof. So, I thought perhaps I'd bring up that topic again. I had a few ideas over the weekend, of particular memories to tell you all... but, alas, I was negligent in writing them down and I have since forgotten. Geez,… Continue reading OMG, Neil, How Could You Do Such A Thing?
I feel like I've been somewhat emotionally fragile - or, perhaps, vulnerable is the correct word - as of late. In my post puzzling over my mental health I mentioned that my mom had said she found my medical records, including my diagnosis etc from when I was 15. (Please read the linked post to… Continue reading Passive Aggressive Shit
I was reading one of those listicles that tell short stories/anecdotes that are all related somehow by the topic. You know the ones I mean - to be honest I read way too many through my Facebook feed. Mostly just similar stories compiled from Reddit. (Unfortunately I searched in Google and couldn't find the exact… Continue reading The Day I Realized My Feelings Meant Nothing