Adventures in Dating, anxiety, David, depression, memoir, memories, mother, relationships, Wyatt

Somatic Symptoms and Problematic Memories

I made a discovery while talking to my therapist yesterday. I suppose I just hadn't thought about it before as both topics are separate in my head for the most part. But yesterday, we as we were working on trauma response, as we transitioned from talking about specific memories of Wyatt to specific memories of… Continue reading Somatic Symptoms and Problematic Memories

Best Friends, Dan, Maja, memories, svea, teenage years

Mosaic of My Life

There is a really beautiful trend happening on Tik Tok right now. Yes, yes... I'm an elder millennial and I Tik Tok. I don't wanna hear about it. Anyway, this trend is about telling what things that you do, say, or think came from other people in your life. It is called the mosaic challenge… Continue reading Mosaic of My Life

Uncategorized

She’s Glorious

I splurged on a new laptop. You guys... she's glorious. She's an Asus Vivobook. It was just in time, too. I ordered her because I'm starting my BSN next semester, and I happened to make a butt tonne of money at my travel nursing job last week (three days of work and made more than… Continue reading She’s Glorious

anxiety, Medical, memories, Uncategorized

Suddenly, My Vision Was Gone

There I was, lying back in the dentist's chair with a nasal mask resting on my face. My limbs were tingling and I was slowly getting sleepy. I thought to myself 'I don't think nitrous oxide is supposed to knock me out... is it?' I had never had it before, in all honesty. I didn't… Continue reading Suddenly, My Vision Was Gone

books, memoir, Uncategorized

Writer’s Update

It's been awhile since I've let you all know the status of my rewrite for my first book... so here it is. Too be honest I decided to write this update because I basically needed to shift focus from my mess of a manuscript right now! Ah! I had my friend Klutzy go through the… Continue reading Writer’s Update

anxiety, depression, Uncategorized

Heeeey… I’m Still Alive!

I've been so busy lately... I was hoping to write a proper blog post last weekend, while I was off of work - but I was away in Philadelphia for my sister's wedding, and my hopes for some downtime for writing did not come to fruition. I feel like I have so much to say,… Continue reading Heeeey… I’m Still Alive!

anxiety, depression, Medical, memories, Uncategorized

The Puzzle That is My Mental Health

I'm feeling a little bummed. A little unmotivated... It might be partially because my period is supposed to start tomorrow. It may be my kids being sick the past couple of days... or the random interactions or annoyances of the past few weeks that build up and push down on my mood. I dunno.... Or… Continue reading The Puzzle That is My Mental Health

books, memoir, memories, Uncategorized

I Will Not Live In Vain

Ah, here we go again. I've put this aside for too long as I've worked on other projects, but I think I am now ready to pick up my original book ("I Will Not Live in Vain") and finish the 2nd edition that I started working on well over a year ago... Two years ago?… Continue reading I Will Not Live In Vain

anxiety, depression, Husband, relationships, Uncategorized, Wyatt

It Billowed Like a Storm Surge

It hit me dead on; a slap in the face and a punch in the gut simultaneously. I saw a picture of Wyatt and it initiated a wave of nausea that washed over me, no, rather it billowed like a storm surge. I can't explain why I felt the way I did. It doesn't always… Continue reading It Billowed Like a Storm Surge

anxiety, depression, Husband, support, Uncategorized

I Often Grind My Teeth At Night

I always thought of anxiety as panic attacks with heart palpitations, extreme feelings of fear or worry with a bit of hyperventilation mixed in. I think most people are under that impression. This is why I never considered myself to have anxiety. I have only had, from what I recall, one full blown panic attack… Continue reading I Often Grind My Teeth At Night

Excerise, Uncategorized, weight loss

This Kind of Fuckery

I'm gonna talk about temptation today - the temptation to eat sweets and drink bubbling sugary caffeine goodness that is coursing through me right now. Also, the temptation to smack a ... well, you know. It actually, has been a lot easier than I thought to stay away from sweets for the couple of weeks… Continue reading This Kind of Fuckery

Excerise, Posts With Off Site Links, Uncategorized, weight loss

It’s Day 3

Day 3. Okay, you guys. I promise this won't turn into a weight-loss blog, but I feel the need to get some stuff out there regarding this struggle I'm having. So once in awhile you'll have to deal with my complaining, er, updates, or pass a post by occasionally LOL. That being said. It's Day… Continue reading It’s Day 3

Excerise, Husband, kids, memories, Uncategorized

Orange Eating Paraphernalia

Eight Years ago or so I was a skinny minnie. Hell, you've seen my teenager pics... I was so much closer to my teen weight right after having my daughter. I was a size 14 immediately after having pushed her out whereas I had been a size 16-18 at the time of her conception. Teenage… Continue reading Orange Eating Paraphernalia

Best Friends, Husband, Medical, Uncategorized

Badass Flight Nurse, Viking, or Whatever

As I sit on this old couch, in front of a fire that is dying despite my best efforts to build the biggest, warmest fire ever, and as I sip my hot chocolate in an effort to stay warmer still... My heater died a couple of days ago, the day before a snow storm here… Continue reading Badass Flight Nurse, Viking, or Whatever

Uncategorized

Yaay, Woot, Hurrah, etc etc

Whoops, I meant to sit and write this yesterday... but then... I didn't. Lol. I just wanted to point out, as WordPress so kindly did, that yesterday was the 3 year anniversary of this blog. My 3 year blogiversary, if you will. Yaay, woot, hurrah, etc etc I wasn't even sure if have much of… Continue reading Yaay, Woot, Hurrah, etc etc

David, Husband, relationships, Uncategorized, Wyatt

My Idiosyncrasies

Get ready for a ramble fest y'all. Last night hubs said something that made me think... I have been blaming Wyatt for instilling a lot of negative relationship behaviours in me... and to an extent I think that's still true, but perhaps I've been bred to be ... How did he put it? ... I… Continue reading My Idiosyncrasies

books, memoir, Uncategorized

A Shred of Support

I'm getting to the point in this blog that I'm not so sure what I have or have not talked about here anymore. I was talking to my sister late a few nights ago and said "Clearly this will be my next blog topic," but when I started to think about it I realized that...… Continue reading A Shred of Support

Uncategorized

Obligatory New Year’s Post

Oh geez, it's past 11 PM on New Year's day and I still haven't written my obligatory New Year's post... How are you all supposed to know what my resolutions are, or how great or terrible 2017 was, or what my sights for 2018 are if I don't write a blog post about it?! First… Continue reading Obligatory New Year’s Post

David, Excerise, memories, relationships, Uncategorized

Far Away From My Corporeal Body

I had another dream about David on Christmas Eve. Unexpected, it's been several months if not longer since I've had one of those. I'm not sure if something actually triggered it, or if it was just my brain saying "hey,  guess what we haven't dreamt about in awhile?" Whenever I have these dreams, they always… Continue reading Far Away From My Corporeal Body

Adventures in Dating, Best Friends, Dan, Dane, Husband, relationships, Uncategorized, Wyatt

Maybe There’s Hope for Me Yet

What makes him love me? What made the others not really care about me? Sometimes I think I'm pretty good at reading people, situations, and relationships... When I pay attention that is. At least I used to think that. Over the past year or so, maybe it's been brewing longer... I've realized I often don't… Continue reading Maybe There’s Hope for Me Yet